May 1

There is so much that I want to write about but never enough time.  Many thoughts on my mind these days.  May 1.  The countdown begins.  Party or no party?  After going back and forth, yes, no, we are going for it.  They deserve it.  We deserve it and so does Big Sis.  A celebration of the miracles we have.  16 more days and the triplets will turn one.  Not sure what the next few days will make me feel like.

Flashbacks.

During the month of April last year, we moved homes.  We needed a house with more space for our growing family.  April was the month to do it.  It took us an entire month.  Little by little.  We thought this would be enough time to get settled in before the babies came.  We thought the babies would be born late June at the earliest.  I was worried about making it to Bella's dance recital.  How could I go being almost 32 weeks pregnant with triplets?  There had to be a way.  There was no way I would miss it.

Did I do too much?  Did I not take care of myself? Why didn't our doctor believe in bed rest?  I was careful.  At least I try to believe.  No, I know I was, but still.  A small part of me still thinks...what if...what if I didn't rest enough?  Would I have been able to carry the babies a few more weeks? I followed doctors orders not to pick anything up over 10 lbs.  I couldn't pick up my Bella.  Going to the grocery cart was hilarious.  Bella would climb into the cart with a little push and then jump off.  A couple of times I asked strangers to help.  Never had I allowed someone to push my cart and help me with groceries.  I was so pregnant.  I may not have looked it according to everyone else but I sure felt like it.

About this time last year, I was measuring at 32 weeks but was only about 22 weeks pregnant.  I had discussed my history with my doctors.  A few times I reminded them of my bed rest with Bella.  It started at 32 weeks.  They assured me that since I was able to carry her until 39 weeks I should be fine.  Really? I know...doctors cannot predict the future but come on.  If I couldn't carry one baby without bed rest, how could I carry three? I was terrified of bed rest but only because of Isabella.  How would I take care of her?   After each visit with the doctors (and there were plenty) I always felt so relieved.  Another week without bed rest.  I would have jumped at it now.  I would have begged for it if it would have given them just a few more days.

I could keep going but must get to bed...I should already be asleep!

Cute Sofie pic taken today.  Awww so sweet and innocent.  My baby girl reminds me so much of Big Sister.  Don't let that smile fool you...today Sofia got out of her bumbo seat.  Thankfully she was in one of the playpens with lots of padding surrounding her.  She is rolling a lot, across the room in seconds, taking toys away from the boys, shaking her head, and starting to clap! All of it deserves a celebration!  Let the countdown begin!